I've always wished that after Pyeongchang he'd be able to skate just for the love of skating, without looking at placements or points. I love that there's Nessie out there and now that he's actually satisfied and fulfilled he can go in search for her without worrying too much about winning or losing.
Before the Olympics I worried about him. Not just about the injury, but about what it meant. Winning in Pyeongchang seemed too important to him. When he said something along the lines of the Olympic victory being the moment that would give all his life meaning, I thought "Wait, so if you don't win Olympics your life will have been meaningless?" (And if I remember correctly, he confirmed thinking that in one of his post-win interviews.) Hanging the meaning of your entire life on just one specific moment which, objectively, has better odds of not happening than happening... Man, I thought it was downright unhealthy. I remember how Patrick looked when he got his silver, and I was so afraid Yuzu might end up looking like that too. Only for him it would have been worse.
So, I'm ashamed to say, I was relieved when Javi messed up, and when Shoma fell. When Yuzu won, I wasn't as much happy, as just enormously, unbelieveably relieved for Yuzu, because the alternative would have been devastating.
In his post-win interviews he basically said he hyped himself up and clutched to the thought of "I must win this". In his situation, the prospect of skating with injury, any other person would have gone through some redefinition of their values, allowed themselves a thought "well, I might not win, and if I don't, it won't diminish me". It looks like Yuzu didn't go through this. I find this sort of mindset abolutely terryfing. He pulled off this win on the force of conviction, on faith, more than anything else.
I guess this intentsity, that single-mindednes, insane focus on his ultimate goal and just not being satisfied with less is what enabled him to pull off this miracle and truly become historical. I don't quite understand it and I find it scary but I suppose that's what legends are made of.
Okay, I think I really need some sleep.